Small Group Love

Tonight was a bittersweet night for me.  It was my last small group :(  These ladies have meant so much to me the past two and a half years.  They have walked with me through some difficult times, encouraging to rely on God and to dig deeper into my relationship with Him.  They remind me to focus on the positive instead of being the Negative Nancy that I want to be by nature.

I really enjoy that each of us is in a different point in our lives.  We have mothers who bring the parenting perspective into my understanding of God's love for me.  There are married women with no children who describe how a husband's love is representative of Christ's love for the church.  We have single and dating women too.  They help show me that while having a boyfriend is their heart's desire, God is sufficient.

I will greatly miss these women who have been so instrumental in my life the past almost three years.  I look forward to skyping into small group every now and then.  I love you all and can't thank you enough for your involvement in my life.

 

Let the Wedding Festivities Begin

This past weekend, I had my first wedding party: my small group bachelorette party.  Kim wanted to plan a party with just our small group girls.  We briefly discuss what I would like, a chill dinner at Kim's with some takeout BBQ.  I should have known Kim and Paige wouldn't think that was sufficient for a bachelorette party!!!

All the girls kept everything quite.  As soon as I heard I would need to wear jeans, a cute shirt (not a white one though) and some comfortable shoes, I thought maybe they had changed the plans.  We started the night by going to the early Saturday night service.  Then we rushed to Kim's, and could be there no later than 6.  That made me even more suspicious of changed plans.  We piled into a couple of cars and headed to downtown Raleigh.

I got so excited once I realized we were going to The Pit.  I had actually been talking to Jenn about that the night before, having no idea we would be eating there the next day.  The Pit has been featured in "Throwdown with Bobby Flay" (actually won the rib challenge) and "Man vs. Food."  The place is so busy that Paige had to make reservations a week and a half in advance.

We walked in, and instantly, I said that it smelled like heaven.  Being the BBQ lover that I am, going there was perfect. I'm glad they decided not to settle with what I thought I wanted by staying in for dinner.  I ordered the pulled pork, potato salad, and cheesy bacon grits.  Oh and let's not forget the biscuits and hush puppies!!  Everything was fantastic.

Not sure how a random sweet potato fry got on my plate

These women make me smile. From Left to Right: Top Row - Bethaney, Stacey, Becca, Kim, and Paige. Bottom Row - Me and Jenn

I quickly learned we would be staying in downtown Raleigh for a little while longer.  Apparently, there was a list of 8 things I had to do before we were allowed to go home.  Here some pictures from the night.

No idea what I was getting into

Take a picture in the men's bathroom.  Don't worry. I knocked. No one was in there.

Ask a married couple for advice. The husband's advice: Always do what the wife says.

Yell "I'm getting married!!!!" If I didn't yell loud enough, Kim was going to make me do it again.

Get serenaded by a group of guys. More embarrassing for them than me. They sang "My Girl."

Picture with a nice car. Didn't want to touch it just in case it had alarms.

We completed everything and made it back to Kim's by 10.  We had some cake, watched the Ohio State/Kansas game, witnessed a hail storm, and talked.  I can tell I'm getting old.  We were all asleep by 1.  The girls made some fantastic breakfast on Sunday morning.  We had chocolate chip pancakes, coffee, bacon, doughnuts, strawberries, and blueberries.  Yummy.

Thank you so much to all of my small group girls for throwing this party for me.  I feel extremely loved and blessed.  Thank you for an unforgettable weekend.  Love y'all.

Excitement

I'm getting really, really excited about my small group bachelorette sleepover this weekend!!! It has been years since I've been to an actual sleepover.   I'm sure there will be many moments of embarrassment, laughter, and clean fun :)  I love these women so much.  Can't wait to see what they have in store.  I can only imagine. Haha.

via pinkpreppylillylover.blogspot.com

A Very Important Friend: Kim

In case you're wondering, my bridesmaids aren't the only ladies who will be contributing to Brett's and my wedding.  Brett said it best when he said that his ushers mean as much to him as his groomsmen; he just couldn't have 13 groomsmen.  The same is true with me and our Scripture reader Kim.

Like with Paige, Kim and I have an unusual beginning to our friendship (sorry Kim, I have to share this story again).  I knew of Kim in 2001.  Our first interaction was in 2003.  I was on the high school yearbook staff and was writing a spread about the cheerleading team.  Kim was a teacher and the head cheerleading coach. Oh my goodness, I was terrified of our interview.  I had never talked to her before and wasn't sure what to expect.  Needless to say, with my shaky voice, I got the quotes I needed and ended the interview pretty quickly.

Fast forward to January 2010.  I decided it was time for me to get involved with a Summit small group.  I had been back in town for six months and was really feeling a void from not having consistent ladies fellowship.  I walked into small group and gasp... the first person I saw was Miss Collins!!!  I leaned over to the leader and asked if that was really Miss Collins.  She said, "Well you can call her Kim now."

I quickly learned that Kim is not at all like the teacher I was scared of in high school.  When I get around church people, it's easy to slip into saying religious words like sanctification and acting pious.  Kim's not like that.  She is blunt, real, and doesn't pretend to be someone she's not.  There's no act when it comes to her.  It's like a breath of fresh air.  She makes all new-comers to the group feel welcome and comfortable because she brings us back to who we really are: sinners who have been given grace.  Plus, she is easily one of the most sarcastic and funny girls I've ever met.  Seriously, she and Paige are dangerous if they sit together in small group.

Being that she taught English, Kim shows me things in the Bible that I didn't know or realize.  Not only does she correct our grammar and pronunciation of words (sorry for all my grammar mistakes in this post), she points out the significance of word choices in verses.  It's something that I really enjoy.  Kim also does some of the most fantastic first lessons.  She'll give us background of the book of the Bible we're about ready to study along with a brief geography lesson.  I request she does the first lesson of each new study because I feel like I have such a greater understanding of the book because I've learned about the characters, purpose, and audience.

I'm glad that Kim gets to be a part of our day by reading a passage that is important to Brett and me.  So thankful for you Miss Collins!! :)

Bridesmaid: Paige

This post would be called "An Unlikely Friendship" if I didn't follow the template I used for the other bridesmaids.  I saved Paige for last on purpose.  I knew this post would take the most energy to write because I would have to dig into suppressed memories. Paige and I had a complicated friendship.  I say had because we have a normal friendship now.  What made our friendship complicated was how it started.  Look at the picture at the right. Paige was wearing that the first time I was around her (pictures via Paige).  Yes ladies and gents, that's an Elon jersey.

Now if you know me, you know what emotions seeing that jersey brings up in me: anger, regret, disbelief, sadness. The list can go on.  You see, I played against Paige in the game-to-go (to Regionals) my senior year in college.  My team, the Black Pearl, was up 12-7.  It was my last college sectionals game, and we just needed 1 point to advance.  That's it.  Then Elon scored. And scored again. And again. By the time I needed to call a time-out, the cap was on, meaning I couldn't.  We couldn't regroup. The wind picked up. Being a young team, we struggled. I didn't sub people out like I should have (I was the co-captain).  We were on universe point.  My last college game ever, and we just needed to get 1 point in order for my college season not to end.  To no avail, Elon scored, going on a 6-0 run to advance to Regionals.  Paige was on the team that left such a bitter taste in my mouth. It pains me to write this.  I wish I could have done things differently. 

I NEVER, in a million years, would have thought that one of my bridesmaids would be one of the people from that Elon team.  Guess God has different plans for us sometimes.  Paige came to small group.  Being the nosy person I am, I stalked her on Facebook to learn a little more about her.  I wanted to figure out what she would add to the group.  At the time, I didn't realize she was on that Elon team (I tried to block out everything from that game).  I saw a title on a FB album about sectionals at Elon.  Low and behold, this was the description of the album:

oh right. remember that time when we came back from 12-7 to win on a universe point? ...

I kid you not, my mouth dropped.  Was I really going to have to be nice to a girl who I played against in a game where there were fights breaking out?  Was God really expecting me to share my struggles with this girl?  No way was He asking me to do that.  It hit too close to home, too close to bitterness I wasn't ready to let go of.  I felt shame, remembering how I acted during that game, and wondering if she would question my sincerity at small group.  My actions during that game in no way reflected that I was a Christian.

When I told Paige about my finding, she had a nice kick out of it.  I had to relive that game again, but then we moved on.  Yes I still have some bitterness (obviously if you read any of the words above), but I don't hold it against her.  I think it's more of a funny story now that I tell it.  

Boy, am I glad God brought Paige into my life when He did.  There were things that happened (things that didn't include Brett at all) that made me question marriage.  Paigey quickly became the main person to whom I voiced my fears during my dating relationship with Brett.  She was there for me through the whole process, reminding me of what the Bible says about marriage, listening to me saying the same fears over and over while encouraging me at the same time to believe in the truth of God's Word.  Honestly, she is one of the reasons I was able to regain trust in God's design for marriage after the events that happened.  I am so thankful for her patience with me and the Godly encouragement she gave me.


Paige is recently married and has been a completely open book when it comes to questions about the joys and difficulties of marriage.  She is real with me.  She probably one of the most upfront, not-going-to-sugar-coat-it friends I have.  Everyone needs a Paige in their life.  I cannot explain how much she means to me and how she has positively affected my and Brett's future marriage.  I am so thankful for you Paigey. Love you. Mean it.

Bridesmaid: Natasha

Take a look at that beautiful picture to the left.  The beauty is all due to Natasha.  Not only is she beautiful on the outside, she is even more beautiful on the inside.  She is the essence of 1 Peter 3:3-4 to me:  "Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes.  Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight." (I should note that Tash is one of the best dressed women I know. Love her style).

I have loved my time of getting to know Tash .  I think her unique life adds to her understanding of the Gospel. Tasha is from India (missionaries' daughter) but came to the U.S. to go to college and to work.  She is a world traveler.  She says that because she travels so much and is living in the U.S., she feels like an alien sometimes.  It often reminds her that this world is not her home.  She is made for more than this life.  That is something I'll never forget: her keen awareness of not being of this world.

I LOVE LOVE LOVE listening to her stories and insight.  I could sit with her for hours just learning about her upbringing, culture, and wisdom, not to mention her amazing accent. Even though she's not married, Natasha has taught me so much about marriage. Her parents had an arranged marriage, an idea that Natasha is open to.  This idea of marriage in India has taught me that it should not be based on all the lovey dovey feelings, although those are good. Marriage is choosing to love the person, despite their faults. It's a perfect image of Christ's love towards the church. 

I am thankful that I have a friend who can read AND understand C.S. Lewis and John Piper.  You bring so much cultural knowledge, wisdom, and craziness into my life Tash.  Love you. Mean it.

Bridesmaid: Jennifer

BAHHHHH!!!  Jennifer. Jenn. Jenji. I cannot say enough about this beautiful woman of God.  If you don't know her, you need to get to know. Like, right now.  She is one of the most sweet and gentle spirited people I've ever met.  She actually reminds me a lot of Megan, my MOH. I met Jennifer in high school while running track (she was a year behind me).  We never really talked so that was about as far as our friendship went.

We reconnected at our Summit small group.  At the time, she was one of the youngest in our group, but became the leader.  She is extremely strong in her faith and full of wisdom.  She is one of the strongest prayer warriors I know.  I know if I ask her to pray for something, she is 100% going to do it.  She is a woman true to her word.  Jenji keeps us on track during small group by directing us to what the Bible says about issues, rather than what we "feel" or "think" is the right answer. I so appreciate that in her.

Jenji isn't afraid to ask the hard questions. Even though I may feel uncomfortable with some of the questions she asks, I know she's doing it out of love and in order to keep me accountable.  At the same time, she isn't afraid to be vulnerable.  I think that's something that makes her so special to me.  We can be vulnerable with each other knowing we're not looking with judging eyes and that we will ask each other about how things are going.

When I G-chat with Jenji, I can "see" and "hear" her making the comments because she has such a specific way of doing things, especially her gestures.  Once you get to know her, you'll understand.  She lightens me up because she isn't afraid to be goofy.  Plus, we (us in small group) are making her a more affectionate person...she'll give hugs freely now :) And I must mention that she and Paige have some of the most fantastic faces I've ever seen.  

Jennifer, I am so glad I've gotten to "walk life" with you the past two years.  We'll have a guest room waiting for you in SC.

New 5-Week Adventure

(This post is pretty vulnerable.  I hope everyone can learn from my trial.)

I am so, so excited about the next five weeks.  My small group has decided to study James: the guide to Christian living.  We went through the first chapter of James last night, and man that chapter was packed with so much useful application.  I wish I had read this chapter while Brett and I were going through his job situation.   The whole chapter is amazing but James 1:2-6 hit me hard last night.  James 1:2-4 says:

Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

As some of you know, I had a really hard time during those 6 weeks trusting in God's goodness and timing.  In no way did I considered it joy to not know where we were going to be.  I didn't want to wait.   I didn't see any good at the time in our waiting.  Instead of persevering and being disciplined in reading my Bible and praying, I became disciplined in worry.  Oh my goodness.  All I did was worry.  I would wake up with my stomach in knots.  Every time I got a message from Brett, my heart would stop, and I would start going through "What ifs" before even reading his message.

James 1:5-6 says:

If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. 

I prayed for wisdom and clarity, but I doubted God's timing and that He would give me wisdom.  He wasn't doing things when I wanted him to.  Let me tell you, I completely felt like a "wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind."  It was TERRIBLE!!! I was living in fear.  I said all the right things to everyone and Brett.  Saying it is different than believing though.  I forgot God's promises of His love, goodness, compassion, and power.

Isaiah 30:18: Yet the Lord longs to be gracious to you; therefore he will rise up to show you compassion. For the Lord is a God of justice. Blessed are all who wait for him!

Psalm 27:14: Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord.

Luke 12:32: Do not be afraid, little flock, for your Father has been pleased to give you the kingdom.

John 16:33: I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace.  In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.

Luke 22:31-32: Simon, Simon, Satan has asked to sift you as wheat. But I have prayed for you Simon, that your faith may not fail.

Oh, the hope in that last one.  Jesus goes before me, praying that my faith will not fail.  What hope knowing that the Son of God, my Savior, is praying on my behalf. 

In addition to studying James, we decided to do accountability groups.  The purpose of the groups is to get to a deeper level praying for each other and holding each other accountable.  We'll meet every week after our study and pray for and with each other.  I must say, I am with an AWESOME group of ladies: Jennifer, Bethaney, and Stacey.  I am so looking forward to our precious time together the next 5 weeks.  I am thankful for my small group.

Our Supposed-to-Be Pre-Thanksgiving Dinner

That's a lot of words for a title.  It pretty much explains how my night went with three wonderful ladies: Cheryl, Jenn, and Natasha.  Cheryl has been in Greenville, NC doing a rotation for P.A. school and was in town today so we decided to hang out.  Jenn thought of having a pre-Thanksgiving dinner, full of lots of desserts if you know Jenn.

We had a change of plans because we've all been so busy, and Jenn was cooking for her family's meal tomorrow.  Instead of Thanksgiving food, we had pineapple and ham and pepperoni, sausage, and mushroom pizzas with breadsticks.  Jenn did bring over some pie crust that she and Natasha carved into some letters and added cinnamon and nutmeg for the fall flavor.

It tasted really good.

An "H" for my future last name!

Our night was filled with lots of laughter, some wedding talk, and getting slightly freaked out by the new Willy Wonka.  I love these women!

Cheryl did this WHILE she studied.  She's amazing.

Our hair almost matches!

Take 3 with Tasha.

She is such an encouragement. I love her.

New Experiences

So it's been a while since I posted.  Labor Day weekend, I experienced something I've never done: I went to an urban winery right here in Morrisville.  A couple of my friends and I decided it would be fun to tour Chatham Hill Winery.  For years, I've seen the grape sign while driving down Aviation to get to 40 and always thought, "Well how in the world do they have enough room to have a vineyard right in the middle of RTP?"  As you can see, I have little education about the wine business; I didn't even know the difference between a winery and a vineyard.

We took about a 30 minute tour where I learned that Chatham Hill Winery, established in 1999, was the first North Carolina urban winery.  Did you know that red wine gets its color from the skins of the grapes?  They stomp or press the skins multiple times into the juice so that it stains it.  That's apparently where the extra "health" benefits of red wine come from.  One little factoid I thought I'd share with you. I also learned that French and U.S. wine barrels create different flavors in the wine. I definitely learned a lot.

After the tour, we had a tasting.  They taught us how to properly taste wine.  First, you swirl it to start the oxidation process right before drinking.  Then, in no particularly classy way, you stick your nose in the glass and take a big whiff.  After, you take a small sip so that the wine could touch the variety of taste buds in your mouth.  Apparently, too many people just gulp wine and don't get the full experience and all the different tastes.  Lastly, you another sip and get the full experience of the wine.  They let us try 10 different wines and gave us a sheet with what you should taste and smell with each one and what types of foods would be good with it.  I greatly enjoyed the conversation us ladies had together while sharing this experience.

My lovely friends.

Yep, that explains their personalities. Wish it weren't blurry.

Love spending time with my new friend!

All of us girls. Some of my closest friends.

Batting 1000

So I have found a new favorite thing to do: go to Durham Bulls games.  The Durham Bulls are the triple A affiliate of the Tampa Bay Rays.  Baseball is the best spectator sport.  I don't think there is anything more American than going to a baseball game, eating a hot dog, and singing "Take Me Out to the Ball Game" during the seventh inning stretch.  It's just relaxing being in such a family atmosphere, hanging out with friends.

Well Paige (from my small group), her husband, friend from college, and I went to see the Bulls on Thursday night.  It was extremely hot and humid but we ended up switching seats and sitting under the fans.  Paige and Zach know people so they also got Wool E. Bull to come up and try to help Zach start the wave.  Wool E. Bull also kissed our hands, which apparently Brett was not appreciative of that night when I told him ;)

This weekend was Brett's last weekend in town until late November/December because his season starts in less than two weeks.  We decided to do something fun so we bought tickets to the game on Saturday.  We met one of Brett's best friends Greg, Megan and her friend, and Natasha and her two Aussie friends there.  I was a little nervous seeing the clouds and the sporadic spouts of rain while driving over there.  The wind was also out of control.  Definitely that storm-is-about-to-roll-in feel.

Now one thing I have to mention is the last time Brett and I went to a game, it rained steadily for 2 hours.  Luckily, Brett got us seats under the terrace so we could sit there, stay dry, and enjoy each other's company.  The game started at 10:11 p.m. instead of 7:05.  Because he was teaching me how to keep score the "old fashion" way (which apparently is a lost art), I wanted to stay the whole game.  The game got over around 1 a.m. Needless to say, we went to the 11 o'clock service the next morning.

Anyway....we DID NOT have seats under the terrace this time around.  It sprinkled a little bit, but we came prepared with umbrellas this time, given what happened to us last time.  They covered the field, but the rain stopped so the players started warming up again and they got the field ready.  It was still lightning and thundering, but no rain.  All of the sudden, the bottom fell out of the sky and DOWNPOUR!!! For about an hour or so, we were standing in the concourse.

The rain stopped and the grounds crew took the tarp off the field so we went back out.  So many people left that we sat right behind the home dugout.  Megan was kind enough to wipe off all of our seats.  We waited, and waited.  Brett started heckling the players, which of course embarrassed me.  My long story short, they decided the postpone the game so we didn't get to watch it.  Brett made a good statement saying, "If I had a batting average for me and Sara going to a minor league game and there being a rain delay, it would be 1000."  This is one time that an average of 1000 is NOT good.

Because of Greg and Brett's bromance, and the fact that they both start their season soon and wouldn't see each other for a couple of months, Greg came over and hung out for a bit after the game.  Good thing we didn't stay at the stadium because there were some crazy, crazy storms.  Enough to knock over a tree at the front of my complex.

I'm sad that Brett won't be able to come back for a while, but I'm excited to be able to see him do what he loves.  He's had the itch to get the season going since last season ended.  Anyway, all and all, it was a great weekend with amazing friends.  You know they are good friends when you can still have fun despite the bad weather.   I'm blessed.

The ladies

He's such a trooper

The bromance