10 Mommy Lessons I've Learned: Part II

One of my purposes for writing this two part series is to make sure that new moms don't feel alone.  That is especially true with the lessons in today's post.  These are all thoughts that I've had.  Sometimes I've felt alone when I think these thoughts, but I know that's not true.  Today's post may seem like complaining, but I think they are important points to mention.

Lesson #6: Everyone will have an opinion/advice, but you know your child best.
I have received a lot of advice and opinions about how I should raise Henry. In most cases, I solicited the advice.  I appreciate all of the support and opinions and have tried a lot of them.  The thing I want to tell new moms is that you know your child best.  What works for someone else's child, may not work for yours.  And that is OK.  Take all of the advice as a sign that you are loved and people want to help.  Don't let it bog you down.

Lesson #7: Daddy will most likely father differently than you mother. 
This is a lesson I'm still learning.  I feel like since I'm with Henry all day, I know him best, which is probably true. When I tell Brett something about Henry and he doesn't do it, I often get frustrated.  I have to remember that it's alright that Brett parents a little different on the small things.  There is a reason God gave children mommies and daddies.  We each have different roles at this point in the baby's life. Instead of being frustrated, I have to remind myself how blessed I am that Brett desires to hold, change, and love on Henry. He loves Henry, just like I do. He is a fantastic dad, even when he doesn't do exactly as I say.

Lesson #8: You may get tired of hearing, "This too shall pass," but it's true.
Until about one week ago, Henry had a terrible time falling asleep at night.  I kept on hearing, "This too shall pass."  At that moment in time, it would frustrate me.  I want it to be done now.  Why couldn't Henry be like other babies and sleep all the time? Instead, he would be awake almost all day and be so tired at night that he couldn't fall asleep. But you know what?  It IS passing.  He IS getting better.  His screaming at night is calming down.  While he may not sleep a lot during the day, he is learning.

Lesson #9: You may not like your baby sometimes.
And it makes you feel like a terrible mom.  You are not a terrible mom.  In the beginning, there were many evenings where I had to hand Henry off to Brett because I just couldn't deal with any more.  I think it was healthy for me, Henry, and Brett.  I could regain my composure and breathe.  Henry couldn't sense my frustration.  Brett could learn how to soothe Henry.   Honestly, it saved me from a lot of anger and contempt for Henry.  By taking those moments to myself, I am able to be a better mama for Henry.  Taking a step back for a second isn't something that you should be ashamed of. 

Lesson #10: Love, love, love on your little one.
This one is a given and doesn't need much explanation. Let your little one fall asleep in your arms every once in a while.  Give as many kisses as you can.  Get lots of pictures.  Take in every moment, because it does go by so quickly.

There are plenty of other things that I'm learning, but not enough time in the day to write about them.  Motherhood is hard and has created a lot of tears, but one that brings me great joy and purpose. I love my little Henry!

10 Mommy Lessons I've Learned: Part I

I wanted to document some of the lessons I've learned in my vast amount of time as a mommy. Ha.  I hope this will be informational and an encouragement to mamas-to-be.

Lesson #1: You will learn how prideful you are.
Maybe this doesn't apply to you, but it was honestly shocking to me.  I already knew I was a prideful person, but I didn't realize how much until having a child.  I like the house to be presentable, the bed made, and the kitchen sink empty.  I don't like asking for help.  I want to do it all. Sometimes, it's just not possible.  I've learned spending time with Henry is more important and that the bed can wait.  People generally understand that the house will not be spotless.  I ask Brett for help with the house, Piper, and Henry.  He willingly does it. When my mom or Brett's mom are around, I ask them to watch Henry so I can enjoy my coffee or take a shower.  There is nothing they would rather do than hold Henry.  They also know what they are doing.  I mean, Brett and I turned out pretty well.  Basically, I need to let go of some of my unrealistic expectations that I need to do everything for everyone.

Lesson #2: Don't be embarrassed by your baby crying in public.
This goes along with Lesson #1.  There have been two instances where I have taken Henry in public, and he has just cried.  I fed and changed him before going out, but he still cried.  I was so embarrassed, thinking that everyone around me would think that I was a bad mom because I didn't have the perfect child.  Get a grip, Sara!  He is a baby.  Babies cry.  People didn't judge me, but instead gave me a look of understanding.  It was only me that was giving me a hard time.  I need to learn to lighten up on myself. 

Lesson #3: Breast milk digests fast.  Like, faster than me writing this sentence.
I knew that I would go through a lot of diapers with Henry, but I didn't realize how much.  I didn't know that in the first month, Henry would poop while he was eating.  That is how quickly babies can digest breast milk.  I had to ask the doctor if that was unusual.  She said that was a great sign that he was getting enough to eat and that it was completely normal.  It was and is frustrating when he has been awake a while, I change his diaper, feed him, and while he's eating, he poops again.  He still does it sometimes at almost two months, but definitely not as much. I just have to remind myself that this many diapers is a good sign that he is getting the food he needs.

Lesson #4: Try to take a shower every day.
I cannot stress this enough. I heard this from one of the girls in my Sunday School class and didn't realize how important it would be.  Now I do.  I felt so gross from all of the things coming out of me after delivery and all the changes my body was going through.  Lots of people say to sleep when your baby sleeps, but I say to take a shower during one of those naps.  Even now, it makes me feel less disgusting and more human. So, so important.

Lesson #5: Your body may not bounce back like what you expect or hear.  That's OK.
You may be blessed with a body that bounces back the next day.  I'm not.  I'm going to say it.  I gained between 45 and 55 pounds during pregnancy, depending on what you count as my pre-pregnancy weight.  Given that I'm breastfeeding, the first 30 came off pretty easy.  The rest is a work in progress.  I'm just now getting to the point where I feel like I can do some exercising (needless to say, the aftermath of labor has been tough on my body).  The stretch marks don't do away quickly.  I have actually gotten more in some places (thank you breastfeeding).  I'm learning that it's alright that I don't fit into my old jeans yet.  I'm enjoying spending time with my new buddy.  The time goes by too quickly to be worried about losing every single pound right now.

Hope you enjoyed my first five lessons of being a mama and that it was beneficial to some of you.  Stay tuned for my next five!