Blown and Tossed

As I sit here writing this post, there is a storm rolling through Holden Beach.  It woke me up at 5:30 this morning.  The thunder continues to boom and the wind howls past the bedroom door leading to the deck.  I look outside and the waves are building, crashing, the receding back into the ocean.

I just started doing Beth Moore's James study.  How fitting to be at the beach when I read the following verses:

"If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind." James 1:5-6

One of the things I struggle with the most is doubt/worry.  I doubt God always has my best interests in mind.  I doubt he is good all the time.  I doubt he will answer prayers (even though I know in my head that "No" is an answer).  It's a constant battle to remind myself that God is good and wants to bless until my cup overflows.

Looking out the window to see these waves made the verses above hit home.  I don't want to be blown and tossed by the wind.  I know what it feels like to be so unstable, and it's exhausting.  James 1:5 says all I have to do is ask God for wisdom, and it will be given.  He won't laugh at what I ask for, nor will He scorn me for it.  He will give it generously.  However, there's a catch.  I must believe that He will give me wisdom.  There can be no hint of doubt.

Oh God, give me faith to believe.